You cannot be quenched if you never drink

Lately I have felt dry. Not so much in regards to my actual physical thirst, but in my spiritual life. I think we all go through times like these. Seasons when life beats us down, we seem to disconnect from the Lord, and our passion seems to wane. That is where I would say I was about 2 weeks ago.

I was sitting in church listening to the message and I began to hear the Lord speak to me. (Crazy, right....God actually speaking to His people IN church!) I allowed my mind to drift from what Joe was saying...I didn't think he would mind. Surely our pastor would like to take a back seat to the voice of the Lord, right. I thought so too!

I felt like God was posing me this question...."What's wrong?" Almost like when he was confronting Adam and Eve in the garden after they had sinned. He certainly knew where they were....and he certainly knew what was wrong with me, but he also knew it was to MY benefit that I share it with him. So, I laid out for him my sad state of affairs. Boo Hoo for me....I have to care for my mother all by myself, we have buried 4 of our grandparents this year, my boys pick at each other all day long, money is tight....blah, blah, blah. I had quite a list for the Lord. Then I felt him say again...only more emphatically, "what's wrong?"

I could sense this time that the question had very little to do with the circumstances of my life and everything to do with the condition of my heart. So, I confession my arid condition. I was much more like a desert than an ocean in terms of spiritual passion. My flames were barely flickering.

I decided to pose my own question to the Lord. So boldly I asked, "why do I feel so dry?"

His response came swiftly. "you are parched"

"I know that Lord...I have confessed my dryness to you...but, WHY am I feeling this way?"

And in the way only God can He said (SO CLEARLY I might add)..."You can not be quenched if you never come to the well to drink."

OUCH.

Lightbulbs going off. Confession being made. Repentance taking place. I had been neglecting my own personal time with the Lord. In a gentle, yet direct, way God was reminding me that I NEED Him. A personal quiet time is not a project that must be done in order for me to remain on the "best Christian woman" charts. It is a means to meet with the creator of the Universe....the lover of my soul. Drinking for the well on Sundays is not enough....I need His presence and his power daily. My old youth pastor would say, "you wouldn't just eat one giant meal on Sunday and then not eat again the rest of the week, would you?" But isn't that what we do with God. We pull up to the table on SUnday (when the meal has been prepared for us) and then we neglect to satify our spiritual hunger when it's up to us to prepare the feast.

This will no longer be my story. I am committed to personal time with God. Not because it's a standard Christian discipline....but because I need it to survive. I am humble enough to know that I am NOTHING without the power and presence of God in me. I am no good. It is only the Lord in me that can accomplish anything. It is only by hearing his voice and entering his presence that my life makes any sense at all.

The Lord confirmed this in my life at the women's dinner earlier this week. A sweet friend and mentor in my life, Debbie DUnlap, shared her story with us. She talked about how sweet it is to talk to God. Although she talks about prayer a bit differently that most people I know. To her, prayer is a true conversation. Moments of talking, moments of listening, and moments of quiet reflection. I LOVE that! She reminded me that God is speaking....if I will but quiet myself I will hear him.

May I forever remain near to God...ever in His presence and witnessing his power.